My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
