Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
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