the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
