big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
This couple is walking their pig around campus
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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