You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
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