I'm drive I can fine osifer
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
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