I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
