It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Randomize
