You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize