I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Randomize
