We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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