no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
