I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”