so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
You are a genius and a whore.
Help. Why am I so naked?
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
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