i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
You ate ashes out of my bong
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