Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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