I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
