in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
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dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
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Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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