He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
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