Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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