I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
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