somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Randomize
