you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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