Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
