At least make sure they are 18
Why
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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