Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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