Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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