some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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