Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
