just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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