im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
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