I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Randomize
