I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
