My hand turned me down
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
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were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
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