I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
