found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
