I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
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