Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
There r osticjed everywhere
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Randomize
