We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
