If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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