I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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