ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Randomize