Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
