Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Barsexuality is the new black.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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