What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Randomize
