Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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