Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
