grandma shit on top of the toilet
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
there was a trapeze. enough said
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
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