dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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