are you still at the devil's house?
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
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