guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
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