U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Randomize